Strength in the Waiting

When I was growing up as a young girl I remember many times hearing adults say "Don't pray for patience because you can be sure the Lord will test that". So, as silly as it sounds I found myself as a young girl being very careful not to "pray for patience." As an adult I better understand now that God does not just create situations or trails in our life just to teach us something, but rather takes the trails that we all face in our lives and uses them to build our character and to strengthen us - if we allow him too.
I would have to say that this past year for me and my family has been filled with numerous trials. A house that still sits for sale after 9months, slowing work, a brother in Iraq, Brian's back surgery, praying about where we go from here as a family.... as these circumstances in our life began to unfold this past year I found myself seeking God, asking a lot of "why's and what now" questions. Much of our circumstances were out of my control and many times we have had to just wait and see how God would answer. But that waiting can be so hard at times. 
One morning, during the spring of this year, I found myself reflecting on "waiting" and having patience. I knew that I didn't want to just sit and say (sigh)"Well, Lord just give me patience....I'll hang in there....you'll answer sometime....(sigh)! No, I wanted to move through these trials and situations with strength and purpose even if I didn't always know how it was going to turn out. I didn't want to find myself at the end of the day saying "well, good I made it through another day". 
So I began to ask the Lord "how should I pray then, how do you want me to walk through this time"? And what I felt the Lord saying to me was "Pray for strength in the waiting." That was my WOW moment. Yes, strength in the waiting, that is what I desired. Webster defines strength as "the state or quality of being strong, durability, the power to resist attack." I began to see our situation in a whole different light, I felt I could pray with purpose and hope, because I knew that God would give me strength for each new situation that we would face. I may not have all the answers, or know exactly how it was all going to work out, but He did and does. The verse from Isaiah has continued to resonate in my heart this last year; Isaiah 40:29,31 "He gives power to those who are tired and worn out; he offers strength to the weak. "But those who wait on the Lord will find new strength. They will fly high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint." 
There are plenty of days where I feel weak and tired and just not sure I can take one more day, but then this verse comes to mind and I know that as I come before his throne with my weakness and lack of strength then He will be my strength, he will hold me up, and he will help me walk another day...but not just walk, but walk with purpose, with strength and even to fly.
I beleive each of us has a time in our lives when we need that strength that only God can give. Maybe for you it's not waiting but mayge it strength in being a mom, strength as a wife, strength in healing, strength in grief, strength in your health....the list can go on and on. 
I encourage you to take time today to ask for that strength...He will not fail you because His word promises that His strength is ours. 
So go ahead...Go ahead and Fly!!

No matter your address

This week finds me busy packing our family up for yet another move. It doesn't seem that long ago that we were moving into our current home. The other morning I was remembering a word that the Lord spoke to me about the time that we moved into this home two years ago. It was a rough time in my life, relationships were struggling, finances were tight, and life in general seemed so uncertain. One morning, standing at my kitchen window washing dishes, I found myself crying out to the Lord - Why? and What? and I'm sure a million other questions. It was one of those times in my life that I felt so alone and afraid of what the future might or might not hold. Have you ever had one of those moments or times or even decades? :) I'm sure you have, we all have. How many times had I found myself in this place? Probably more than I care to always remember - At one point I remember asking "Lord, are you even there? Do you even care?... and you know what? He returned with an answer.... In the midst of my turmoil he whispered to my heart "I am, and Tori, It doesn't matter where you are or what your address is, I am here. I have never left and no matter where you go in life, how many houses you move to, how many locations you find yourself in, I will be there, period! You can't change that...because I love you and you are mine."
The wave of reassurance that flooded my spirit was overwhelming, to say the least. All the uncertaintiy and turmoil that I had been feeling seemed to vanish and instead, peace filled that place where there had been tears. 
As we prepare to move this weekend, I remind myself that "no matter my address" He will walk with me, no matter my trial, no matter my joy. He will be there. 
Reflecting on that reminds me of the story of Ruth. Now there's a lady that went through some tough times, but what I am drawn to is her answer to her mother-in-law as Naomi prepared to return to her homeland - Ruth 1:16 ..."I will go wherever you go and live wherever you live. Your people will be my people, and your God will be my God." 
She knew that this God of Naomi's would go with her also, and that she could trust in that, even when the future must have seemed uncertain. That's the kind of faith I want to move forward in as we look to see what else God wants to do in this new place.

Pausing OR Praying?

Over the last week I have had this particular devotion on my heart and felt impressed to share it with you. It is one of those "golden nuggets" of challenge and truth that has been resounding in my heart since I read it last week, especially right now as Brian and I find ourselves seeking God for what he has for our family in this next year.
Taken from the devotion "Walking in the Dark" by Lisa Harper:
"The key to walking successfully in the dark isn't in the PAUSING; it's in the PRAYING. Because merely waiting without seeking God's direction is as fruitless as herding cats! God is teaching some of us to be still and listen, and He's teaching others to hear His mandate to move. To get up and take a step of faith - even when we aren't sure of where we're walking." 
(Devotional Verse - Isaiah 42:16)
It has challenged me to continue to press in and pray even while I am waiting on God and seeing how he is going to move or to hear what step I'm to take next. 
Maybe you are in a place waiting to hear from God on a particular matter. Maybe it has to do with a personal step, or direction for your family or children. Whatever your situation I challenge you to pause AND pray, not to give up even if you feel like you are walking in the dark. I leave you with this encouragment - 
"For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me." Jeremiah 29:11-13 NLT

Mom to Mom,
Victoria

A Different Kind of Woman

About three weeks ago I embarked on a new stage of life. College!! Yes, at 32 years of age I have returned to the college campus. It has been a wonderful journey so far...though I would have to say, so different from my first experience at college 15 years ago. 15 years ago, as a freshman, I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life or what God wanted to do with it for that matter. Looking back on these past 15 years, including marriage, raising children, creating a home, starting two businesses and being in ministry, I could have never imagined the ride of life that God would take me on. But he has been so faithful over the years. Now that we have moved to Shipman, I am close enough to Liberty University to take classes on campus. Right now I am working toward a degree with a concentration in Women's Ministry. Early into the first week I came across this quote, that was posted outside the Womens Ministry office on campus:
"The fact that I am a woman does not make me a different kind of Christian, but the fact that I am a Christian makes me a different kind of woman" - Elizabeth Elliot - 

Wow!! I love that quote - and as I have pondered it over the last few weeks I had to think that it applies to the area of motherhood as well. Instead of using the word "woman" insert "mom" or "mother" or "grandmother". 

It's a high standard, and while I know that I fail often in the area of being "mom" I always want to work at being a "different kind of mom".